Stupid, stupid, stupid

Yesterday, in a moment of pure desperation, while attempting to style my unruly mop of hair, I broke the #1 cardinal law of being a girl...

I cut my own bangs.

Honestly, you'd think at 30 I would have learned my lesson. You'd think I would remember all the other times I thought I could just trim a little and wound up with a hack job on my forehead.

Well, I didn't remember.

After the massacre, I began stying my hair. I thought they weren't so bad, and that I might actually be able to live with the mess, when Celia comes in to the bathroom and announces, "Mommy, your bangs look really stupid."

Oh honesty.

She voiced what I feared. I am good at a lot of things.

Trimming my hair is not one of them.

My bangs look stupid. I hate them. I want to cry.

So, for the next several months until the damage grows out enough to manage, I will be styling my favorite Red Sox cap, and creative variation of the pull back with bobby pins.

Did I mention I want to cry?

So, if you see me around and about...

Please don't laugh.

Oh, and try not to stare.

A Night All To My Lonesome

Munchkin is at her dad's.

Hubby is at a Jazz game.

The house is all mine.

Favorite sweat pants on.

Contacts out.

Bra off.

History Channel on.

Crafting, here I come.

Ahh, life is good.

Very, very good..

Giggle, Giggle

So, apparently I don't have much of a sense of humor.

I guess I'm pretty oldy, moldy. Like on a Friday night, take me the Blockbuster and I head straight for the drama section. I love flicks like The Duchess, Elizabeth or Pride and Prejudice. Good stuff.

Not so funny.

My sweet hubby on the other hand got all giggly when he heard "poop deck" on an audio book. We were listening to The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, so they said it like a hundred times. And there he is just a giggling each and every time.

Ah, potty humor.

Do boys ever grow up?

What do I get all giggly about??

Adam Sandler.

For your viewing pleasure... The Hanukkah Song.

Cue my giggle fest.

What's with the emotions?

No, I'm not pregnant.

But, thanks for asking.

I would like to be though. The body just isn't cooperating according to plans.

Which is weird.

Getting pregnant with Celia took all of about 5 minutes being off birth control.

I know, I know. It's only been two months.

Since when have I ever been a patient person?

More than the whole non baby thing, my body is starting to worry me. I just haven't felt right the past few months.

Weird stuff.

I'll spare you the details.

So today, I'm a bit emotional. Hopefully a dinner date and chick flick with my hubby will help.

He bought me tickets to New Moon and he lets me eat all the popcorn.

What a saint!

Poor guy.

How'd he ever get stuck with me??

30!

Ok, so it's come and gone... I'm officially 30!

And I'll have to say, It's not quite as bad as I thought. Then again, I've been a little preoccupied with a few other things lately.

30 is different than I exptected. It's not at all what my expectations were. I'm definately not where I thought I'd be at 30. But, maybe that's a good thing! I'm a very different person than I was five years ago and I'm very content with where my life is right now. I've settled a lot these past few years.

30 seems a right age to be getting married. It's funny, Dan met me when I was 18 years old. He's known (and loved!) me in my teens, twenties and now in my thirties I know I will be spending eternity with him. It just seems fitting. This past weekend his great aunt said to me that we looked like we were made for eachother. I happen to agree! He is my soul mate. My best friend. He's patiently waited almost 12 years for me.

So, happy birthday me!

This year I have a lot to celebrate!!

Peach Pie for Breakfast

Yum! Peaches.

Just about my favorite thing about summer. And I've frozen about four quarts for those cravings in the winter.

Yay me!

Swine Flu...Lucky Me

Yep. I have it. I don't know how or where I was exposed. Uck!
So, if you've been around me in the last week and aren't feeling so hot- please make a trip to the doctor. Apparently, I'm highly contagious. So sorry!!!
My prayers now are that Celia doesn't get it. She felt a bit warm after her nap today. I hope I'm not being overly cautious. She's started an antibiotic though. Just in case... This is SO not fun!!

Woodstock

It's the 40th anniversary of Woodstock. Flipping through the archive photos and listening to the accounts makes me nostalgic. Which is a little strange considering my mother was about 10 in 1969 and I wasn't even a thought.

Really though, I missed my era. I would have been that girl. You know the one. Long hair, poetry reading, peace loving, free spirit.

Yep that one.

That would have been me.

But, then again thinking back to myself at 19, it's probably a really great thing that I missed the 60's.

I would have gotten lost.

Peace

Slightly Neurotic

Sometimes I genuinely think I'm just a little OCD.

My clothes in my closet have to be organized by color and sleeve length.

Dishes have to be in the cabinets just so.

I obsessively iron everything, including Celia's play clothes.

And then there's the Skittle thing.

See my point?

First I separate. Then eat in just the right order. Green, yellow, orange, purple, red.
So yeah. I'm slightly neurotic.

But, I've come to terms with it.

I struggle sometimes...

I'm engaged to the most patient, loving and supportive man. Dan loves me in ways that surprise me everyday. He is affectionate, thoughtful, kind and he makes me laugh. He honestly thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the world. And all other girls have disappeared for him. He listens when I talk and remembers things that I'm concerned about or that I might want or want to do. He sends me little notes to remind me he misses me and is thinking about me. He is working his tail off to be able to buy our little family a house and move out here so we can be together. He sincerely loves my daughter and misses her just as much as he misses me. Maybe even more! I could go on and on. Dan is such a good man and I'm the luckiest girl in the world that he waited patiently for 10 years for me to figure out what I really wanted.
So where's the struggle? It's me!! Stupid, insecure me. I struggle to accept his love. I struggle to trust. I struggle with just allowing things to be good. I was burned so badly in the past that even a compliment is hard for me to accept. Take last night. I must have driven him nuts with my anxiety. But, he patiently talked me through three or four phone calls until I finally settled down enough to sleep.
I love Dan so much. I wish I had better words to describe how I feel. I need to just relax. Just accept that I have an incredible man, who loves me unconditionally. He's not going anywhere. He won't hurt me. He won't lie to me. And in 50 years, he's still going to want to hold my hand and spend every minute possible together. Hopefully by then I'm not so neurotic!

A Tag, A Tag, I've been Tagged...

Crazy 8's Tag: 8 questions, 8 answers, 8 tags (don't forget to leave them a comment that they've been tagged)

8 favorite TV shows:
Ok, so I don't really watch TV anymore. But, way back when I actually had a TV I used to watch:

1- Grey's Anatomy
2- Lost
3- Northern Exposure... really old. But there was a cable station that did re-runs.
4- House
5- Um, that's about it.
6-
7-
8-


Here's 8 movies I love:

1- Peter Pan (The new one and the cartoon)
2- Stardust
3- Last of the Mohicans
4- Willow
5- Man From Snowy River
6- Pride and Prejudice
7- Atonement
8- Hook


8 favorite restaurants:

1- La Ferovia
2- Rodizio's
3- Ze Tejas
4- The Skybox, not so much for the sports crap, but the nachos are yummy.
5- Louis's Tratoria, it's my favorite Italian in LA.
6- The Union Grill
7- Roosters
8- Javier's

8 things that happened yesterday:

1- Worked. Oh yeah.
2- Blogged
3- Cooked dinner for the first time in a very long time. I'm so spoiled living with my parents!
4- Got a great nights sleep.
5- Helped dig out Kaytlen's mess of a room.
6- Danced to 'Guys and Dolls' with my little munchkin.
7- Gave in and snuggled Celia until she fell asleep. I just couldn't help it, it was so darling the way she asked.
8- Had a pretty in depth conversation with Celia about the logistics of Santa Claus. Man that kid asks so pretty tough questions!

8 things I look forward to:

1- Weekends. Especially this one!
2- Mom and Celia time
3- Dan and Amanda time
4- Holidays
5- Quiet time reading
6- Church
7- The end of a work day and then picking up Celia.
8- One day not having to be a working mom.


8 things I love about Fall:
1- Leaves
2- Pumpkins
3- Pie
4- Sweaters
5- Cool, rainy days
6- Mom's chili and scones
7- Sitting by the fire
8- Cool fall mornings


8 things on my wish list:

1- To be completely out of debt
2- To be sealed to Celia
3- More children
4- Food storage
5- A garden
6- To stay home to raise my kids
7- More time with my family
8- A temple marriage

8 friends I tag: (only if you want too)

1- Randee
2- Michelle
3- Kaytlen
4- Natalie
5- Becky
6- Dan
7- Kiera
8- Tawny

I kinda like these fun little quizes...

1. What time did you get up this morning? 5 ish
2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds! Big ones!!
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Ummm...... Wall-e, maybe? But, I'm seeing Twilight on Friday!
4. What is your favorite TV show? Don't laugh. I seriously don't watch TV anymore. And I don't really miss it.
5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Lately it's a piece of toast with peanut butter and honey.
6. What is your star sign? Virgo
7. What food do you dislike? Broccoli and mushrooms. Yuck!
8. What is your favorite CD at moment? I'm loving the Twilight soundtrack. Also, I've been listening to a lot of Regina Spektor lately. Oh, and my new Christmas CD.
9. What kind of car do you drive? Saturn Vue
10. Favorite sandwich? PB&J
11. What characteristic do you despise? Lying
12. Favorite item of clothing? Jeans and a T shirt
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on holiday, where would you go? London, hands down my first choice. Also, I would love to visit Chace in Spain.
14. Favorite brand of clothing? Something on sale....don't laugh I'm a cheapskate when it comes to clothes.
15. Where would you retire? Definitely somewhere with my family. Maybe we could all pack up and move to the Pacific Northwest. I'd love to own a little bookstore on one of the San Juan Islands.
16. What was your most memorable birthday? This year was pretty cool. I had a lot to celebrate and good friends and my family with me.
17. Furthest place you are sending this? Spain
18. Person you expect to send it back first? Kiera
19. When is your birthday? September 19
20. Are you a morning person or a night person? By default I'm now a morning person. Becoming a mom kind of does that to you.
21. What is your shoe size? 9. Bigfoot! But, they're pretty cute!
22. Pets? I had to get rid of my cats a few months ago. Man, I really miss my big, fat, useless Hamlet.
23. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? Ummm....
24. What did you want to be when you were little? A paleontologist. I loved dinosaurs and science.
25. How are you to day? Anxious and bored. Is that possible to be both and the same time?
26. What is your favorite flower? Lilies and lilacs. Or a bouquet of wild flowers.
27. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to ? This weekend will be awesome. First, I'm seeing Twilight. And Dan will be here!
28. What is your full name? Amanda Kay Bennett
29. What are you listening to right now? Annoying people in the office.
30. What was the last thing you ate? Peanut butter toast
31. Do you wish on stars? Totally! And now I've taught Celia.
32. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Green of course!
33. How is the weather right now? Coolish, like it can't quite decide to be winter or fall.
34. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Dan!
35. Favorite soft drink? Diet Coke. But, I hardly ever drink it.
36. Favorite restaurant? La Ferovia is probably my favorite local place right now.
37. Hair color? Dark with red
38. What was your Favorite toy as a child? My Little Ponies
39. Hugs or kisses? Kisses. But, it's not like I run around like a kissing fool. Only lucky people...
40. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate
41. Coffee or tea? Neither
42. Do you want your friends to email you back? Sure!
43. When was the last time you cried? Watching 'The Bucket List'.
44. What is under your bed? I think some of Chace's things?? I'm a little scared to look.
45. What did you do last night? Had a good evening with my Celia.
46. What are you afraid of? The dark, tornados, snakes, creepy movies and loosing my daughter.
47. Salty or sweet? Salty
48. How many keys on your key ring? Several
49. How many years at your current job 4 1/2
50. Favorite day of the week? Any day that's a Mom and Celia day.
51. How many towns have you lived in? 8?
52. Do you make friends easily? I don't think I do. But, I wish I did.
53. How many people will you send this to ? A few friends, my family. And I might put it on my blog.
54. How many wills respond? Not quite sure.
55. Do you like finding out all this stuff about your friends? yes!!

52 out of 100!

Found this on Randee's Blog. Mine are in bold. I need to do some serious traveling!

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band- Does High School Orchestra Count?
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself art from scratch
15. Adopted a child- Want to someday.
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables (just not well)
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill- It was either that or have a nervous breakdown! :)
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors- I would love to go to England!
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language- Does Celia speak count?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa- I will someday!!
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies- No, but I happily buy them every year!
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason- Thank you Dan!!
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving- Ok. I'm counting this one. I went indoor skydiving and was terrified!
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar- Yuck!
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades- Camped there. And won't do it again!
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person-From the air?
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating- Ewww. That's why we have grocery stores.
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club-I'm putting on together right now!
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake- You'd think I would have. But, it's just way too stinky!
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100.Visited Italy